The vow that binds too strictly snaps itself. ~Alfred Lord Tennyson
Good ex-catholic that I am I still remember the big stuff; Christmas…oh, well just Christmas and oddly enough Lent. And to be completely honest I think I just remember Lent because of Mardi Gras. You don’t grow up a stone’s throw from Mobile, Al (the actual birthplace of Mardi Gras) and a hop, skip, and jump from there over to New Orleans (Mardi Gras central) without knowing when Fat Tuesday is, the feast before the famine, a.k.a. Ash Wednesday and Lent.
When I was a young little thing in Catholic school I remember diligently trying to think of something to give up for Lent, something that would be “big enough” to impress my teachers but not so big that I suffered all too much. I guess even back then I took issue with causing suffering for the sake of causing suffering.
Disclaimer: I do actually fully understand the reasoning behind the Lenten period, I just don’t agree with it and this is my blog and my history so I can be as snarky as I want. I have been removed from the Catholic Church longer than I was ever a part of it, I have no beef with them and I think, at its core, it is a beautiful religion. It’s just not for me.
After I left the Catholic school of my youth and before I found yoga I was floundering around eastern religions and philosophies as well as pagan rituals blended with Native American spirituality. I was lost and craving faith, trying on religions like shoes and walking in them for a few miles, or scooping in pieces of beliefs into a bowl like a baker in search of the perfect cookie recipe; praying for a sweet, fulfilling morsel of God that left me wanting more. But nothing worked and really that’s another blog all together, I bring it up because throughout all this searching I still clung to some of my Catholic tendencies. I went to Mass every now and again to feel a little peace and see people connecting with their Community and with God, in times of stress I would go light candles and say a prayer or meditate in the pews, I even said my mantras on rosary beads. So while I still appreciated some of the rituals Catholicism offered I still could never get my head wrapped around Lent. So I tweaked it.
I decided that instead of suffering for 40 days that we should do something good for 40 days. I asked my Mother is she wanted to get up and walk with me every morning for 40 days, I donated a dollar a day for 40 days to my favorite charity, I tried to kick start a real meditation practice by meditation every day for 40 days, or a simple as I made sure I hugged someone everyday for 40 days. So how about it?
It doesn’t have to be anything profound or grand but do you think for 40 days you could do one positive thing a day. Either for your health, or for your family or Community, or maybe for your mind; allow yourself 10 minutes a day with that book that’s been sitting by your bed of months, planning your spring garden, do a little yoga… For me I’m filing this year’s Lenten promise under “mindfulness.” I’m getting ready to go back to yoga school in April so I want to be in a good place mentally and physically so I’m stepping up my mindfulness about my practice. Are here times when I could be practicing but am not? Just how much do I let my mind wander when I’m on the mat? What really is the best time of day for me to start a meditation regime? I’m not binding myself to an unobtainable goal only to beat myself up when I fall short of it, nope this year I’m just stepping up my game. A little extra awareness to get me over my February hump of Seasonal Affectation Disorder Disease and general malaise and move me into a coming Spring celebration. And as for that whole recipe thing, I’m getting closer to the perfect bite!
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